From The Bowels Of My Brain III

You ready for another "From The Bowels Of My Brain?"

Bags of Olympic inspiration in this lot:

>> I'm glad America is not good at curling.

>> Ridicule me all you'd like. The Climb, the song Miley Cyrus sings, might be one of the best pop songs ever written.

>> I recently realized I've never watched an entire hockey game on television.

>> If marketers had decided long ago they wanted us to eat dog meat, Outback wouldn't offer the sirloin special. It'd be a slab of Saint Bernard with Rottweiler Stew as an appetizer.

>> Can we just all agree that Greetings Cards are the biggest ripoff in America?

>> We need to come up with a better phrase to describe a great moment of acheivement than, "It's something I'll always remember". For me, winning my 8th grade Geography Bee is something I'll always remember, but it's hardly on par with winning a gold medal. My suggestion: "I am really, really happy I was able to acheive this."

>> It costs about $2.50 to do a load of laundry.

>> Everyone uses the phrase "mind's eye" but no one says "mind's mouth." We should start using that term more. True story: The other day I saw the word "strategy" written, but my mind's mouth said "strategery."

>> The best male and best female American skiers of my lifetime also have
some the the coolest names: Bode Miller and Picabo Street.

>> People who hate laughing are annoying. I don't know anyone like this, but I think you can agree that if someone hated laughing that would be annoying.

>> Relative to how bad it actually is, nothing is more frustrating than your Chapstick getting stuck in the lid.

>> You know that feeling when you wake up on a Saturday morning after a good night's rest, the sun's shining through the blinds, The Avett Brothers is playing through the speakers and your 12-week old son is smiling at you. That's a good feeling.